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A Farewell to Mike

It was a dark and stormy night.  Coastal rains pounded the Oregon Coast.  STOP!

Mike Wickre would have ridiculed this opening, but Mike Wickre is gone, so I’ll write it my way, mindful of his dismissive wisecracks from beyond.

With little notice, an old friend passes away.  A Facebook message warned of Mike’s imminent demise.  Days later, a concluding text informed his life was over.  Then silence. Whoosh! Gone!! Only his Facebook page remains – that’s death in the digital world.

Word leaked out, there would be no service.  Mike didn’t want one.  No gathering of friends to bid adieu to an old pal.  No farewells, no sharing of memories, none of those anecdotes and stories that lessen our collective loss.  A fading remembrance swallowed by emptiness.  As Jeff Lynne poignantly asked in the best ELO song that nobody’s heard, “Is this the way life’s meant to be?”

I regret there being no funeral or Celebration of Life.  Rituals are important for saying goodbye.  The world is a poorer place, if as it seems they’re going out of fashion.  The deceased’s wishes are usually respected, though with Wickre, I’m tempted to disregard his desire – to poke back, as he so often poked others.

Most would agree – Mike was a difficult individual.  Kristofferson described him best – a walking contradiction, partly truth, and partly fiction.  Need I add: eccentric, bombastic, irreverent, nutty, sarcastic, and cynical, with an over-arching egotistical approach to life.

But he had a charm and charisma that’s hard to ignore.  At the end of the day, he made me a better person.  But half the time aggravated the hell out of me.

Mike Wickre’s 1973 Enumclaw High School graduation photo.

The obituary nobody else wrote, so I did

Michael Irwin Wickre was born to Marilyn (Smith) and Raymond Wickre in Bremerton, Washington on Oct. 3, 1955.  His grandmother was a Lakota Sioux.  Mike took pride in his Native American heritage.  He said she was “white as china,” and died without a clue. Fittingly the family moved to Lakota Beach in Federal Way where Mike attended Lakota Middle School.  There he became close friends with Brad Broberg, who remained one for the rest of his life.

The Wickres moved to Enumclaw in 1969 when Mike was in 8th grade. They lived on S.E. 408th Street in the foothills east of Veazie Valley. Mike’s younger brother, Alan described their small farm as “the last house before the hill. We had cows, horses, ducks, chickens, rabbits, and geese.  From the creek, there was a pipe to our man-made pond.  It was a great place to be a kid.”

One of Mike’s first Enumclaw friends was Joe Cerne who remembered his dry-witted humor and quick tongue.  “Mike was the funniest guy around,” Joe recalled, “I never laughed louder than being with him.”  Kevin Rustvold remembered how he loved playing pinball and foosball, but remained a serious germ-a-phobe all of his life.  Mike’s class became the first 9th graders to attend high school since the new building opened in 1962.

Mike graduated in 1973 and found work at Weyerhaeuser, saving money to attend a four-year college. He was proud of his time in the woods and shared plenty of stories about planting trees and setting chokers.  He also worked at Hygrade’s meat packing plant on the Tacoma tide flats and chronicled the time he shoveled pig guts into the grinder.  He remembered the plant as “a five-story pile of filth on a site so toxic it is still uninhabitable for rats,” then added, “It got worse.”

Mike Wickre’s description of his injury while working for Weyerhaeuser: “Got caught in the bite . . . the haul-back was side-washed and stretched out of plumb . . . it snapped and the mainline caught me just below my man stuff. It sent me downhill riding the butt rigging . . . felt like getting my leg caught in a car door.
Saved enough money to go back to school. Pretty fun memories and good friends . . . most loggers are very nice men underneath their Copenhagen stains. Loggers chew because it’s too danger to smoke cigs or weed while setting chokers. Plus you need a little ‘something’ out there.”

Mike labored at gritty jobs and took classes at Green River Community College.  He hung out with Enumclaw classmates, Tony Pedrini, Kevin Rustvold, John Kochevar, Mike Shook, and Steve Dunning.  Most were involved with the Enumclaw Soccer Club and played for the G.R.C.C. Gators.  (Mike and Steve are seen photobombing the team in a nearby picture.)  Mike had an entrepreneurial spirit. He started a company called Acme Hornet Hunters, whose business was to remove wasp and hornet nests while selling bees to high school biology classes. It wasn’t a stinging success.

Enumclaw Soccer Club 1972-73. 1st Row, L-R: Tony Pedrini, Ted Klahn, Ricky Thompson, unknown. 2nd Row, L-R: Pete Bowman, Kenny Cowells, John Kochevar, Paul Raine, Mike ?, Bobby Remein. 3rd Row, L-R: Kevin Rustvold, Theron ?, Mike Shook, Coach Alf Meubauer, Frank Nichols. Photobombing from behind the fence: Steve Dunning and Mike Wickre.

After earning enough money and Green River credits, Mike enrolled at Western Washington University in Bellingham. He majored in journalism and wrote for the Western Front student newspaper.  Mike was always attracted to the bizarre and enjoyed his first big journalistic success with a Feb. 10, 1978 article about human cloning. It was picked up by wire services.  He graduated from Western in December 1979 and moved home, throwing himself into the Enumclaw scene.

Mike joined Greg Lovell and Tony Pedrini in renting a house on Griffin Street across from where the new Four Seasons restaurant was being built.  They called their bachelor pad the No-Tell Motel.  He sang backup in Kevin Rustvold’s band named Sphincter.

The band Sphincter, circa 1977. 1st frame, clockwise: Les Walthers on keyboards, Mike Wickre clapping, Mike Hanson on bass, Kevin Rustvold on guitar, and Mike Shook kneeling with microphone. 2nd frame, L-R: Dave Reynolds, Kevin Rustvold, Mike Hanson, Mike Shook.

With Pedrini and Rustvold, he coached Jack’s Scrappers, an Enumclaw girls’ softball team.  After-game parties at the No-Tell Motel featured Rainer beer.  They collected the empty bottles until a pickup load generated enough funds to purchase a refrigerated keg tap.  Celebrations typically started Thursday night after softball and often extended till Friday.  The No-Tell bachelor party ended two years after it began.

Jack’s Scrappers, the women’s softball team that Tony, Kevin, and Mike coached went undefeated that season. From the July 21, 1977 Enumclaw Courier-Herald.
L-R: Greg Lovell in blue shirt and white tie, and Mike Wickre pointing to the pickup load of Rainier beer bottles while carrying a BB gun.

In September 1980, he joined the Enumclaw Courier-Herald and worked under its legendary editor, Robert “Bud” Olson.  Mike was the paper’s only reporter.   Small-town newspapers don’t pay much, so he quit the Courier-Herald in April 1981 and joined a marketing guru who showed him the ropes for selling advertising.  The job fit his journalistic background and business initiative.  That training propelled Mike to a very successful career selling newspaper, TV, and radio ads.

On Sept. 18, 1982, Mike married Nancy Ann Johnson, a Dakota Indian. She was the adopted daughter of an English author, Emilie Johnson who wrote “My China Odyssey.” Mike and Nancy bought a home in Northshore between Tacoma and Federal Way.  With what he learned about selling ads, Mike opened his own marketing firm, AdStrategies, LLC, which he later operated out of a condo just above the Tacoma Dome.  He earned bucket loads of money as a one-man advertising agency for auto dealers, car shows, and RV sales firms like Baydo’s.

Mike and Nancy’s marriage fell apart in the 2010s when Mike moved full-time into his Tacoma condo.  Nancy died in October 2015.  Three years later, Mike met Jacinta Mwihaki Njeri online, a nurse who goes by the name Dee.  She was attracted to his humor and found him to be a very funny guy, as almost everyone did.

The couple married on Sept. 19, 2020.  Dee told me that Mike liked to cook and was a good one.  He also enjoyed watching sports on TV, especially baseball, and also World War II histories.  A few months before he died, Mike wrote, “In case I croak, I am on record. Greg Wasell and Steve Bunker were the funniest guys I ever met. Greg was always thinking ahead for a prank. Bunker made planting 800 trees a day fun.”

In early December 2023, Mike fell, hitting his head which caused bleeding in the brain.  He lapsed into a coma and died at Tacoma General Hospital on Dec. 29, 2023, at age 68.  Michael Irwin Wickre is survived by his wife, Jacinta (known as Dee), his mother, Marilyn, a sister, Marla Wickrefujimoto, and two brothers, Alan Wickre and Ryan Wickre.

Mike’s ashes are buried at the family’s Tokeland cabin with a lilac tree planted above. Really, Mike?   Planted beneath a lilac tree? After the last shovel full of dirt was stomped on his remains, Wickre’s ghost whispered a snarky retort, then spit a wad of chew on the grave.

The Wickre I Knew

I first met Mike Wickre in the spring of 1975, the last quarter of my senior year of college. I was living at home and worked afternoons at a coal mining job in Ravensdale.  When the job ended I found myself with lots of extra time.

It was good to be back in The Claw.  I was taking a tennis class so walked the block to my elementary school, J.J. Smith, to hit balls against a cinder block wall.  One day Mike stopped by and struck up a conversation.  He remembered me from school.  Two of his friends, Scott Veenhuizen and Jeff Wasell shared a small rental a couple blocks away. Mike invited me over to hang out and play Foosball.  The evening gatherings typically consisted of beer, pot, Foos, and banter.

We became friends … sort of.  With Mike, you never really knew where you stood, except you were standing beside a guy with an engaging smile and captivating personality.

In the mid-1970s, a commune-influenced, all-you-need-is-Love, whole-grain aura still burned astrologically bright within the faux hippy crowd around Enumclaw.  But Mike’s bruising personality tolerated no such sentimentality.  He was a tough-minded logger who worked in the woods and shoveled pig guts at a packing house.  Yet behind his barking bravado lived a literary wannabe.  And even deeper lurked a misfit hiding his awkwardness.  Mike once confessed, “Yes I know I am socially retarded.   Let me know if you can work with me – your friend, Mike.”

A college classmate, Bruce Hyland reflected on the dichotomy, “An interesting thing about Mike … he seemed to have one foot in the hard-scrabble, Enumclaw working man’s life and the other in the civilized world of writer/soccer player/college life. And he didn’t quite fit in either.  He always straddled between the workingman and the effete world of journalism.”

I never grew close to Mike because, at some primal level, I feared his explosive outbursts. Still, I liked being around him. Mike was that kind of guy – a cunning sense of humor delivered with a biting tongue.  Mike’s favorite quote, one by Winston Churchill captured his antagonistic personality, “He has all the virtues I dislike, and none of the vices I admire.”  Wickre loved Monty Python’s skit, “The Argument Clinic.”

Like many great friendships, ours blossomed on the sporting field.  Mike invited me to join the Dolezal Chiropractic slow-pitch softball team that Ken Prince captained. By the spring of 1977, I was working as a management trainee at a bank and living in Seattle. I drove an hour to Enumclaw for late afternoon games.  We kicked off the season on April 23, playing a double-header on Saturday, one morning game and one in the afternoon.

The Dolezal soft-ball team, circa 1977. Mike is barely visible in the back row with a hat and shaded face. Other are Ken Prince, Tony Pedrini, Bruce Radford, Alan Wicker, Chris Coppin, and Bill Kombol, front row, second from right.

After the second game, we celebrated our loss at the Logger’s Inn in Buckley.  It was Wayne Podolak’s 24th birthday which entitled him to a free 72-ounce birthday mug. We all got slowly plowed.  Mike, Greg & Jeff Wasell, and I ended up at Lioce’s in Auburn for more beer and pizza. We nearly ended the night in a bar fight.  Mike was the kind of guy you wanted by your side in a bar fight.  That’s how you built friendships in your twenties.

A few months later I recorded our team’s lineup in a June 13 diary entry:

Catcher –Mike Ackershot and me
Pitcher – Ken Prince
1B – Chris Coppin
2B – Dan Darby
3B – Donnie Robinson
SS – Wayne Podolak
LF – Mike Wickre
LC – Dave
RC – Jeff Wasell
RF – Greg Wasell

Les Hall also played but was absent.  That day we lost to the Lee Restaurant roster headed by Keith Fugate, Kim Kuro, and Stan Fornalski.

At the plate, Mike belonged to the “go big or go home” school of thought.  Every swing was for the fences.  The guy could hit softballs a mile and often did.  Win or lose, the real team bonding started afterward at one of many local drinking dives.  That night we ended up at the Alcove Tavern.  Enumclaw had five or six downtown saloons within a block’s walk, all of the same ilk – neon-lit, smoke-filled, fading posters, pull tabs, pickled eggs.

That summer we waterskied at Lake Sawyer where Mike was witness to a bee flying up my nose and stinging me.  As Mom applied meat tenderizer to my nostril, Mike lost control laughing. He never let me forget it.  That same afternoon Mike got sick after drinking too much beer and vomited on the deck.  Afterward, he marveled at how nice my mother was, “She didn’t even yell at me.  She was always smiling.”

A week or so later, I wrote in my diary, “Friendship is nothing more than shared experience.”  Mike was a shared experience.

He began joining other events with our gang of friends.  We played poker with a longstanding circle of my pals.  Here’s how Mike described us:

“I played with you old bastards – Keith Hanson, Jim Clem, Pode, Lester, Wheels – smart guys, smart asses. I don’t know if I ever laughed so hard.  I had just started a business, scared stiff, no income, playing poker.  And for about three hours, an escape for me, it meant a lot. Old Rugged Cross, high-low split – best game ever.  I sure would like a rematch with those guys.”

It was Mike who introduced us to Old Rugged Cross, a card game we still play to this day.  In a February 2021 message, Mike continued with memories from high school:

“Nothing but respect for all of them.  I had to hit Jim Ewalt in the balls in high school choir, but he respected my authority.  In the bass section, those guys were big – Ewalt, good ol’ Bill Tuk, and Randy Verhoeve took turns punching me in the seeds during breathing exercises.  And it always hurt.  But within a week I had hit them all in their egg bags.  I lived to talk about it.  That’s why I respect those guys because they respected a coward like me.”

Wickre also joined our last two beer smorgasbords in 1978 and ‘79.  What’s a beer smorgasbord?  When a bunch of guys bring assigned half racks of beer to a party whose purpose is to blind taste test the most popular brands until everyone’s blind drunk.  Mike was proud to be there and later bragged:

“It’s important to note my early successes amongst you old bastards. That night I was ‘Rookie of the Year’ and ‘MVP’ for identifying three of 15 beers. We ate saltines, and Podolak, Copperman, and you danced on the balcony in your underwear to celebrate Dale Troy going ‘In the Navy.’  It was also the night my incredibly rich, hot fiancé left me on the Veazie Flats, and that was that.”

Mike Wickre, left and Lester Hall opposite in yellow shirt at the 1979 Beer Smorgasbord at Lake Sawyer.

He added a concluding coda: “Les Hall drank a pitcher of beer through his jockstrap, which he proudly never washed – for several years judging by the stains.”

In February 1980, Mike called me from the Courier-Herald.  The nation was in one of its periodic freak-out moments with 53 Americans held hostage in Iran and energy costs soaring.  I worked for Palmer Coking Coal Company in Black Diamond. We were experiencing a surge in demand selling coal for home heating.  Wickre came to our sales yard and interviewed my uncle Carl Falk and me.  Mike was a sharp reporter who quickly grasped our market position and wrote a fitting article.  He even doubled as the Courier-Herald’s photographer and took several photos he used in a story appearing on the front page of their Feb. 28, 1980 issue.

In time Mike joined our golf group, the Duffers’ Golf Association (DGA) winning the four-round summer tournament in 1988.  The winner was awarded a passed-along Green Jacket that he kept in the trunk of his car that winter, where it was ruined by battery acid.

A mid-1980s DGA foursome. L-R: Tom Noltenmeyer, Jay Carbon, Tom Cerne, Mike Wickre.

Most of the golfers attended the Mariner home opener. Before carpooling to the Kingdome, we assembled at a convenient south-side tavern for pre-game warm-ups.  Mike drove that night, joined by my cousin-in-law, Ron Thompson, and me. Mike proudly wore a new Mariner hat.  From the backseat, Ron snatched the cap from his head.  Mike sternly asked for its prompt return as a drunken Ron Thompson mocked him. Mistake!

Tensions flared. Ron raced from the car with Mike in fast pursuit.  He chased him with a ferocity that scared the living daylights out of me. Wickre’s primal anger gave me the chills.  I interceded with a patient pleading and Ron was spared a thrashing. You could give Mike the business, but crossed a line at your own risk.  I never came close to crossing it.

Mike’s sporting life

Mike often reminisced about his high school years. In order to tell a coherent story, I’ve parsed through his blather and bluster in various Facebook missives and private messages. Let’s call it Wickre lore.

The school yearbook lists his 9th-grade activities as choir and French club, but he also joined the baseball squad under Coach Ron Miller.  Mike told the story of having to give his up uniform mid-season to Mark Vannatter, a classmate and son of school administrator Don Vannatter. Wickre growled, “I like baseball.  I just don’t like baseball coaches.”

As a sophomore in 1970, Mike turned out for both basketball and baseball, and continued with choir.  On the baseball diamond, he bristled under head coach Frank Osborne’s dictatorial style, but was mesmerized by his instruction.  Like most players, Mike called him by his initials, “My mentor, F.O. taught me life lessons, and how to hit. He turned me into a varsity pitcher.  But he didn’t understand that I won’t back down. You could have made a movie of me and Frank.”

Mike called Osborne his Oedipal coach, a Freudian reference to jealous feelings a son has towards his father.  As a sophomore, Mike was the team’s fourth pitcher which meant Fungo bats and shagging balls.  He recalled Coach Osborne’s superstitious nature, “If you shagged infield balls and the team won . . . guess what?  Wickre’s shagging balls for the rest of the season.”

One of Mike’s true joys was being around that year’s top pitcher and Hornet team leader, Jim Clem.  Wickre called Clem “his all-time mentor.”  Mike laid it out in a private message:

“I have a little manic attack going on.  I have to tell someone this tale to stop laughing.  I was a gangling sophomore.  I played baseball in the 4th grade and said ‘No mas.’  So here I am, geekier than geek, and I sit down next to Jim Clem.  Like sitting next to one of the Apostles. He talks to me.  I think he was wearing an ascot.  I am having a legend speak to me – my eyes wider than my ears.  When I found out Clem was going to be my coach, I did three somersaults. Then he leans over and lets me in on a secret, ‘F.O. is the biggest prick you’ll ever meet.’”

“My two finest coaches were Doug Baldwin, wrestling at Lakota Jr. High, and Jim Clem, baseball at Enumclaw High.  Both encouraged … not a negative word.  Blessings to both for turning a boy into a man.  I hope I can pass it along.  And actually try to be like Clem who told me his simple mantra, ‘Wick, I get better and better every day.’”

His senior year Mike joined the baseball team but didn’t finish the season.  Here’s how he described that truncated experience.  “Irony is fun when you play along.  F.O. kicked me off the Varsity Hornet baseball squad because I had long hair.  Now, I have no hair.  Karma’s . . . a bitch.”

Which Mike Wickre

Bruce Hyland, a friend from college made a number of acute observations about Mike.

“We met at Western in the journalism program. I had moved from upstate New York after the service and was going to school on the G.I. Bill.  Most everybody else seemed young and soft … Wick, on the other hand, was clearly more worldly wise … audacious, witty, with no B.S.  We clicked from Day One.”

Three decades and a whole lot of changes passed before Bruce reunited with his college friend.

“When I finally came out for a visit after some 30 years, Mike put me up at his place, gave me a car to use, fed me, and lost to me at Cribbage (just like in college).  We went to a college newspaper gang reunion at a Tacoma night spot that some alums organized because I was visiting. We had a great time.  Played a round of golf the following day.  He was seeing (and I met) an assortment of sketchy women who knew that old saw about God giving men two heads, but only enough blood to run one at a time. A good friend in every way.”

By autumn 2016, some six years later, when he returned for a college newspaper gang reunion, Bruce encountered a changed Wickre:

“He’d been on meds for some kind of operation plus he was taking something to help him sleep.  He’s virtually medicated all the time. And weed was legal so he was always tokin’ up. Lives a very isolated life … seems to be getting more irrational.  He was wary and even paranoid … accusing me of screwing up his seriously screwed-up car.  A very different personality.”

Two of Mike’s favorite Facebook profile pictures. Left – Hunkpapa Lakota Chief Sitting Bull, circa 1885.  Right – Mike Ring-a-ling, March 2015.

Mike made me a better writer

I hadn’t seen Mike for over a decade.  We last crossed paths around 2010 at Gold Mountain and made plans to connect on the golf course.  Instead, we connected on Facebook.  Mike discovered my interest in writing, which I practice on that illiterate social medium called Fakebook.

Now I could enjoy the fullness of Mike’s wickedness. As the Prince of putdowns berates me publicly for overusing personal pronouns – I, me, my.  And says my sentences are too long.  “Keep your sentences short, like Hemingway.” And my paragraphs needed to be shorter.  “Let the words breathe,” Mike counseled.

This typical Wickre response came after reading one of my essays:

“As you know, I usually embarrass you worldwide.  So this is just us boys.  I consider you a great friend, and an easy target. Put Billsie on the tee, and I will give him a proper whack.

“I like tightened copy.  Reporters in the type era were paid by the published inch.  Copy editors were paid to cut words.  See last sentence.  So these idiots that worked for newspapers had to get to the point, tout suite (French for immediately).”

Then a few weeks later:

“Look at you improving your writing.  Paragraphs are fun, every 30 words, just easier to read.  I like when you reach out a bit more in your descriptive – you are on the right track – push the edges and you will get there.  I want to see fire … rage … laughter, tears, and resolution … 1,000 words, no plagiarism or misspelled words.  Lean into this manifesto … don’t let me down.”

And more encouragement:

“I like your tighter writing. You might enjoy the down-to-bones approach of Hunter Thompson and Mark Twain.  Avoid Faulkner, who is verbose.  Flowery puff is just not good.  Capote wrote tight. Condense.  Hemingway wrote some books I am told. Use short sentences with vigorous language. You have the skills but your writing is generally weak and in the passive voice. Your facts can’t be questioned. Use active verbs, and avoid the word ‘I’. You are smart enough to do better.  I have hope.”

Plus advice on what to read and why:

“If you haven’t read it, try Ken Kesey’s “Sometimes a Great Notion” – about loggers. Best book I have read outside the Bible. Read both three times. Some of it stuck. You will get lost in it. It’s set in Oregon, but could have been Enumclaw. But, a crappy movie.”

You’re on my bucket list

For the last five years of his life, I tried to set up a dinner to reconnect.  My efforts began in 2019 with offers to host a restaurant meal with two close friends, Jim Clem and Tom Cerne.  Then came Covid, which tanked plans for nearly two years, much of it due to Mike’s germ-a-phobe consternation.  He kept dodging my efforts with outrageous requests and changing demands.  By the fall of 2024, we made progress toward our long-planned get-together which I thought was getting close.  It didn’t happen – my sad regret.

One of Mike’s last messages to me: “You’re on my bucket list.”  Now I’m left with the loneliest words in the English language, “If only.”  Our dinner reunion will never be realized.  If you have plans to meet an old friend someday, remember John Fogerty’s fateful song, “Someday Never Comes.”

A Farewell to Mike

It was a dark and stormy night.  Coastal rains pounded the Oregon Coast.  My wife and I made our way to Kyllo’s, a seafood grill in Lincoln City where the D River flows into the ocean.  When guided to our table, we passed a nautical display featuring an Ernest Hemingway quote.  I snapped this photo knowing Hemingway was Mike’s favorite writer.

The Ernest Hemingway display in Kyllo’s on the D River in Lincoln City.

Later that Saturday night I sent it to Mike via Facebook Messenger. He replied within a minute, “Listen to Ernest …”  On Sunday afternoon, Dec. 10, 2023,  Mike wrote his final Facebook post, “Thanks to Bill Kombol.”  I didn’t see that post until after he died.

Mike Wickre’s last Facebook post, Dec. 10, 2023.

The title photo standing atop this essay came from “A Farewell to Arms.”  At our Lincoln City home, we have accumulated a nice collection of decades-old books, among them a first-edition hardcover of Ernest Hemingway’s 1929 novel.  Its binding is secured with black tape and the inside cover is stamped ‘Discard.’  The imprint of Enumclaw Public Library is scratched over by a black crayon.

I researched the quote from the restaurant display hoping it might be from “A Farewell to Arms.”

“Try to learn to breathe deeply, really to taste food when you eat, and when you sleep, really to sleep.  Try as much as possible to be wholly alive with all your might, and when you laugh, laugh like hell.  And when you get angry, get good and angry.  Try to be alive.  You will be dead soon enough.”

Here’s an irony Mike would fully enjoy, it isn’t a Hemingway quote.  It’s by William Saroyan, a novelist, playwright, and short story writer of the same era.

Sometimes a Great Notion

On numerous occasions, Mike urged me to read Ken Kesey’s “Sometimes a Great Notion.”  I’ll be honest – he practically bludgeoned me.  Mike read it three times.  The best book he ever read besides the Bible.

Several years before he died, I bought the Audible version of Kesey’s second novel.  Many critics consider it his greatest.  Tom Wolfe, who later chronicled Kesey’s exploits with the Merry Prankster, took note of its brilliance.  After seeing its 28-hour length, I promptly lost interest and the recording collected digital dust.  When Mike died, I knew what must be done.

Sometimes a Great Notion, audiobook by Ken Kesey.

“Sometimes a Great Notion” tells the story of an Oregon family of gypo loggers.  They are led by a hard-headed patriarch, Henry Stamper who has two sons, Hank the stubborn first-born, and Leland, the sensitive half-brother, from a second and much younger wife.  Leland moves east with his mother, attends Yale, but returns to the family logging show to settle scores.  Conflicts between father, brothers, workers, and log mills brew in the old-growth forests as union forces seek to stamp out the family’s independent ways.

Upon finishing the book, I began to see why this novel so appealed to Mike.  Resistance to authority, the life of loggers, a college man’s struggle against convention, a consciousness-raising literary style – it’s all there.

I finally understood why he so wanted me to read it.  I began to glimpse the specter of the boy he was.  And perhaps the man he wanted to be.  Reading “Sometimes a Great Notion” became my requiem for the repose of Mike’s memory.

Rest in Peace, Mike – under that lilac tree.

Mike and his family: “Sometimes I mind my own snarky business, a hate-filled wretched old P.O.S. Then sometimes the best time of your life sneaks in and makes it all worthwhile.
Pictured L-R: Tarzan the chess wizard, my love Jacinta (Dee), my brother Alan, Edith Finley, my lovely mom (Marilyn), and Beth of the beach who is my new B.F.F. I ate four Dungeness crabs, just polished off the last two.” — Mike’s Facebook post Sept. 3, 2018.

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Epistle for Mr. McGreen

Have you ever wished you’d said “thank you” but never did?  For me, it wasn’t too late.  This essay was adapted from a letter* sent to my favorite teacher.  I just learned Mr. Wally McGreen passed away on March 19, 2022 at age 83, so share this essay as my parting tribute. 

Dear Mr. McGreen:  It’s a funny thing about life.  It takes time to realize how thankful one should be.  And so it is with me, as this letter is long overdue.  I’ve thought about writing it over the years, but always found more pressing needs to consume the moment.  Today seemed perfect: St. Patrick’s Day, snowing, my children off to events, with an unengaged afternoon.

It was a very long time ago, September 1962.  I left the K–3 world of Byron Kibler elementary and began a fresh journey at a new destination, J.J. Smith.  I was one of the fortunate 4th graders to experience our first male teacher, a young man fresh out of college named Mr. McGreen. The other five classes were taught by women, as had been every teacher at Kibler.  Plus, my new best friend, Jeff Eldridge, was by my side.  Surprisingly, this new teacher lived on my street in a boarding house of sorts, just a stone’s throw from our home.

Fresh out of college and a newly minted elementary teacher, Mr. McGreen, made a mark on our 4th Grade class at J.J. Smith, Spring 1963.

That fall, Mr. McGreen organized the boys of our class into a football team.  Sorry girls, you were stuck playing four-square or jumping rope.  He drilled us daily through simple plays at recess.  Over and over we practiced those few calls.  Mr. McGreen entrusted me with the role of quarterback and Tim Thomasson as halfback.  Most plays were similar––I took the snap and handed the ball to Tim while linemen pulled left or right.  Mr. McGreen then scheduled a series of football games between ours and the other 4th-grade classes. Though we lacked the pure talent of other teams, our tightly choreographed snaps and daily drilling resulted in clockwork plays. We crushed every opponent in that ad hoc 4th-grade league.

One day, Mr. McGreen invited me to stay after school.  He pulled out a deck of cards and taught me to play cribbage.  It was a great game for improving arithmetic skills and understanding odds.  For weeks, we’d play most days after school.  Soon, I was good enough to play with my grandpa, who also loved the game.  Decades later, I taught my own children just as he’d taught me.

The annual 4th-grade field trip in spring took us to the Museum of History & Industry, Ballard locks, and Ye Olde Curiosity Shop. What a delight to see a real hydroplane up close and personal.  Or seeing huge gates open and close, watching boats magically rise and fall.  Mr. McGreen was our guide.  While eating sack lunches, he sat next to me.  Our last stop was the waterfront, where we examined curios in a store with a real mummy of a Wild West origin.  What a thrill for a young boy from Enumclaw, but more important was the affection I felt from my teacher.

Near the last days of school, Mr. McGreen announced a class auction with currency from credits students had earned. We each brought in our trinkets and collectibles for all to admire until the big day, when we bid in a real auction for the items we’d lately grown to cherish.  The excitement and anticipation were no doubt better than the real thing.  I don’t recall what I bought, but my best friend Jeff purchased comic books based on classic tales like King Arthur and the Knights of the Round Table.  They seemed so sophisticated compared to the Archie and Superboy comics I read.

4th Grade, J.J. Smith (1962-63) – Mr. McGreen’s Class.                                             Row 1 (L-R): Mark Myers, Joe Sharp, Billy Kombol, Tom R., Curtis Barber.
Row 2 (L-R): JoAnne Barret, Denise Alcorn, Gail Gardner, Loralyn Walden, Linda Ralston, Naomi Langsea, Sharlene Johnson. Row 3 (L-R): Danny Stanford, ??, Jack Person, Steve Rex, Sharon Peterson, Laurie Mitchell, Don Krueger, Ken Kurfurst, Karl Uhde. Row 4 (L-R): Cindy Nordyke, Tim Thomasson, Marsha Millarich, Pam Ziltner, Janie Whitbeck, unknown, Diane Jones, Tom DeBolt.

The 9th year of my life was not without its challenges.  On more than one occasion, I disrupted class and was banished to the hall for Mr. McGreen’s classic discipline, a primitive form of yoga––sitting with your back against the wall in the shape of a chair, but without one.  This was punishment with a purpose: to improve one’s posture, develop muscle strength, and test your ability to sit uncomfortably for long periods, all the time remembering what had brought you there. My behavior improved decidedly after a few trips to the hall.

I did well in most subjects, earning A’s in social studies, spelling, and arithmetic; B’s in most others, and a C in reading.  But Mr. McGreen delivered the only ‘D’ of my school career––in penmanship!  Still, he cared.  Mr. McGreen sent home writing lessons administered by Mom, where I spent hour after boring hour practicing better handwriting.  The exercise books contained pages of blank lines to be filled by copying and recopying illustrated samples.  I carefully inscribed print and cursive characters within tight parallel lines over and over––diligently trying to make my penmanship legible, or at least less awful.  Their dedication toward my self-improvement paid dividends a decade later during college finals when scripting readable answers in blue books.

The dreaded D in writing (penmanship), the only one I received during my school career.

That school year ended, and another began.  Again, I was blessed with the only male teacher, Mr. Noel Thornburg, in 5th grade.  He too, was fresh from college and lived a few blocks away in a garage apartment. It was another wonder-filled year, pierced by tragedy that November.  The assassination news came over the intercom that Friday morning, with students immediately sent home.

During the 1960 election, Mom supported Nixon while Dad voted for Kennedy.  Thinking the thoughts of a 10-year-old, I asked her, “Are you glad Kennedy was shot?”  She sat me down and gently explained, “Of course not.  Kennedy is our president, and after the election, he became my president too.”  I still had a lot to learn.  A few months later, the Beatles hit America.  I had a crush on a girl who showed me her Beatles cards and told me everything about four guys from Liverpool.  My affection for that beautiful girl never blossomed, yet never faded.

She had dozens of Beatles cards, which were almost as fun to admire as her.

A year and a half later, I entered 7th grade at an imposing, three-story brick building on Porter Street.  The first day brought good news: Mr. McGreen now taught junior high and would be my homeroom and social studies teacher.  Life with Mr. McGreen in junior high was a transforming experience.  He entertained us with stories of growing up in West Seattle, his college years, sorority panty raids––all of it filling me with dreams of one day attending college.  Each Saint Patrick’s Day, the very Irish Mr. McGreen came to school decked out in a bright green suit.  In my 7th-grade yearbook, he affectionately wrote, “To the little general – from Mr. Wallace McGreen.”  The next year, he scrawled, “To little Billy Kombol.”

Mr. McGreen signed my 1967 Ka-Te-Kan yearbook in Junior High.

In 7th grade, Coach McGreen guided us through flag football.  It was the last year many of us turned out for that fall sport.  It was also when I first realized my youthful sports prowess would soon be eclipsed by small size.  As I look back at the photo, all my friends were there, in one place. That winter, he coached our 7th-grade basketball team through drills and inter-squad games played in the girls’ gym. After practice, we took long showers under hot water that lasted forever, then walked home in winter air as steam rose from our still-damp hair.  Could life get any better than this?

7th Grade Football Enumclaw Junior High (Fall 1965) – Mr. McGreen, coach.
Front Row (L-R): unknown, Dale Troy, Gary Varney, Jeff Krull, Kevin Shannon, Billy Kombol, Bill Waldock, Kris Galvin, Bill Fawcett, Tryge Pohlman.
Inset: Lester Hall. Back Row (L-R) Scott Davies, Richard Babic, Rick Barry, Jim Partin, Tim Thomasson, Jim Ewalt, Jim Clem – Captain; Wayne Podolak, Del Sonneson, Jeff Eldridge, Steve McCarty.

The cleverest assignments he ever gave, but only to select students, were to create countries of our own imaginations, complete with maps, history, and customs.  No extra credit was given.  We worked on our projects for weeks. I regularly compared notes with Les Hall and Wayne Podolak, who were also in on the game.  What a brilliant and inspiring activity for cultivating fantasies.  It was a remarkable way for a teacher to challenge pet pupils.

One of our biggest thrills was the State “A” Basketball Tournaments.  Mr. McGreen invited a few of us (Jim Clem, Gary Varney, Les, and Wayne) to pack into his fastback Mustang, pure status for 12-year-old boys in Enumclaw.  After driving us to the UPS Field House, we experienced a menagerie of teams and colors competing for the state title.  Later, we stopped at Cubby’s on Auburn Way South for burgers and fries.  Back home, I swam in the glory of the evening just spent.  You can’t make this stuff up––an engaged and enthusiastic school teacher expanding his students’ horizons by offering new experiences.  It was an amazing way to grow up!

Mr. McGreen from my 1966 Ka-Te-Kan yearbook.

Time marched on.  I said goodbye to junior high and left Mr. McGreen behind.  New teachers, coaches, friends, and interests arose. High school beckoned and so did a driver’s license, after-game dances, chess team, Boys’ State, Hornet newspaper, Courier-Herald sports writer, summers selling popsicles, Saturdays working at the mine office, water skiing, movies, malls, graduation, then off to college.  Upon graduating in 1975, I received an unexpected congratulatory card from my 4th and 7th-grade mentor.  Mr. McGreen remembered me after all those years.  Being a foolish young man of long hair and little regard, I hadn’t the presence of mind to write a proper thank-you note.  Decades passed, and still, I hadn’t.

Many years later, I attended his retirement party where we exchanged pleasantries.  The next time I saw him was at my Mother’s funeral.  His kindly face had aged, but it touched me all the same.  I began to consider that I was but one of thousands of students he taught.  Yet he made me feel so important.  Did he know how profoundly he’d impacted my life?  A thank-you message was long overdue.  A year later, I sat down and finally wrote my rambling letter, much of which is replicated here.

Mr. McGreen was one of the best people in my life.  The seeds he sowed took root, and my life became richer for it.  Though eons ago, his mentorship was one of the most precious gifts I’ve ever received.  

So I’ll end where I began.  Perhaps there’s a Mr. McGreen in your life who never knew the extent of your gratitude.  Maybe this could be the day your letter is written and that gratefulness acknowledged.

* Adapted from a letter written to Mr. McGreen on Saint Patrick’s Day, 2012, from his former student, Bill Kombol.

 

 

Categories
Musings

First Tastes of Mortality

“Whatever became of the moment when one first knew about death? There must have been one, a moment, in childhood when it first occurred to you that you don’t go on forever.” – Tom Stopppard, Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are Dead

More than fifty years ago, two grandparents died on the same day.  It was the last day of summer, and the first time anyone close to me had died.

A dragon lives forever but not so little boys
Painted wings and giant rings make way for other toys.
One grey night it happened, Jackie Paper came no more
And Puff that mighty dragon, he ceased his fearless roar.
                                    – Leonard Lipton / Peter Yarrow

Released in Jan. 1963, Peter, Paul & Mary’s “Puff the Magic Dragon” soon topped the charts.

I remember those first thoughts about dying.  It was the spring of 1963 and I was nine years old.  Grandma and Grandpa Morris lived in a large, white, country home west of Enumclaw on McHugh Street.  The radio played in the background.  The number one song was “Puff the Magic Dragon” by Peter, Paul & Mary.  It’s a children’s song wrapped in fabled lyrics released during the height of the folk era.  I’d heard it before, but never fully absorbed this line: “A dragon lives forever, but not so little boys.”  My tenth birthday would be in a month or so.

Grandma (Nina Marie Morris) was in the early stages of dementia which even a boy could recognize.  She was easily confused.  One day, Billy Hawthorne (the son of Grandma’s part-time caregiver) and I played a cruel trick on her by hiding in the closet.  We watched her search for us in vain.  After frantic calls we reappeared, only to see a vacant look of despair on her bewildered face.  Mom explained she had hardening of the arteries, causing blood to flow slowly to her brain, meaning she couldn’t think as clearly as before.  She was ill and wouldn’t get better.  I felt bad about our trick.

Grandpa and Grandma – Jack and Marie Morris, a night on the town in San Francisco, 1959.

The song ended but a feeling lingered – I wouldn’t be a little boy much longer.  Just like Jackie Paper, my imaginary dragons and toy soldiers would soon be gone.  Those wistful feelings of melancholy floated in the wind like the down of a dandelion.

One evening that summer, I lay in bed.  It was a Friday or Saturday night.  Next to my bed was a cheap AM radio.  Late at night, I spun the dial picking up a distant station in Salt Lake City and listened to the final innings of a baseball game.  It ended and the nightly news was read – “At 12:01 a.m., a convicted murderer on death row will be executed by firing squad.  Growing tired I turned off the radio and saw a blindfolded prisoner led to a brick courtyard.  The moment passed but the memory remained – a boy, the radio, a distant broadcast, the bleakness of death.

Bad posture, Billy at Grandma & Grandpa Morris home, Spring 1967.

In the 14th year of my life, the grim reaper appeared.  It was 1967.  Music defined my world and I delighted in its sounds.  Newspapers called it the “summer of love.”  For me it was a summer of friends, family, fun . . . and Sgt. Pepper.  Each morning brought new sounds and adventures.  The sun shone day after rainless day, for so long it set a record – 67 days without rain.  The bluest skies you’d ever seen were in Seattle.

That September, I entered the final year of junior high as a 9th grader.  Three weeks later that cozy world was disquieted by the death of two grandparents: Grandma Morris and Papa Kombol.  On the same day, my father lost his father, and my mother lost her mother.  In a way, this double death was a tonic for both parents.  They told us kids of feeling like orphans, leaning on each other – weathering funerals and wakes, one after the other.  September 21st was the last day of summer . . . and the autumn of my youth.

Papa Tony Kombol and Grandma Nina Marie Morris died on the same day.

Both grandparents were elderly: 82 and 77, yet important fixtures in life.  Papa (Tony Kombol) babysat me when I was four and five.  Mom dropped me off at their home near Elk Coal where I’d follow Papa doing chores, fixing lunch, then put me down for a nap.  Legally blind from a 1925 coal mining accident, he stayed home while Grandma Lulu taught school in nearby Selleck.  Needing to be near Enumclaw’s medical facilities, Papa stayed at our home the last few weeks of his life.

Grandma Morris was the first person I remember reading to me.  We flipped through “Two Little Miners” so many times I could picture each page.  I boarded an airplane for the first time in late June 1962, a Boeing 707, when she and Grandpa took me to San Francisco.  We braved chilly Candlestick Park and watched my first major league baseball game.  The Giants won the pennant that season.

When in San Francisco Grandpa always stayed at the Maurice, a businessman’s Hotel near Union Square where that day we had our shoes shined, July 1962.

We dined in the Starlight Room of the Sir Francis Drake Hotel, celebrating  great-aunt Ruth’s 75th birthday . . . and my 9th.  I still have the menu dated July 3, 1962.  Two weeks earlier, Tony Bennett released the song, “I Left My Heart in San Francisco.”

Great Aunt Ruth’s birthday was July 4th and mine July 5th, so Grandpa Morris took us to the restaurant at Sir Francis Drake Hotel.  It was a fancy place with the date  printed at the top of the menu.  The waiter gave it to me as a souvenir.

In later years Grandma Morris was confined to the Bethesda Manor nursing home not far from our home, falling deeper into the darkness of dementia.  Mom visited her daily, sometimes twice.  She hired our neighbor, Wilma Boerlage to provide extra care.  I’d go on occasion, but in time she no longer knew me.

Jack & Pauline Kombol, late 1967.

Over the coming weeks, I began to imagine life without parents.  It was the year Mom stopped tucking me in and saying nighttime prayers together.  Alone in bed, save for a pink teddy bear won at the Puyallup Fair, I thought of the future.  One day Mom and Dad will surely die, just like Grandma and Papa.  A profound sense of sorrow consumed me.  Visualizing their deaths, I cried myself to sleep each night.  I tried to figure a way out – what if they never died?  Maybe I’d die first and be spared the heartache?  Whatever scenario I concocted, the end was always the same – falling asleep to tears.  The end of their lives and my childhood hung in the balance.  But I knew not how or when.

Unbeknownst to me, the thoughts of that 14-year-old boy were long ago known by Stoic philosophers.  The anticipation of hardship softens its eventual blow.  A Stoic prepares for the future by focusing on the worst possible outcome, a Latin principle called premeditation of adversity.  Seneca advised his followers to rehearse ruinous scenarios “in your mind – exile, torture, war, shipwreck,” thereby robbing the future of its awful bite.

By morning, Mom woke me as I skipped downstairs to find a hearty breakfast on the kitchen table.  Jean and I walked to the Junior High, a three-story, brick building four blocks away.  There I roamed halls, diagrammed sentences, and played with friends after school.

Male tear ducts shrink as boys become men.  It becomes more difficult for men to cry.  Evolutionary psychologists can no doubt tell you why.  My tears were gone in time.  Ninth grade led to new friendships and adventures.  I turned out for basketball and made the greatest team ever.  I raised tropical fish in an aquarium.  At semester’s end, I earned my first perfect report card, all A’s.  As a special treat, Dad took me to the Four Seasons in downtown Enumclaw for Chinese food.  I felt pride in the glow of my father’s love.

Twelve years later, I wrote a poem to read at his funeral.  The lines recalled the mournful feelings of those earlier times:

The last day we expected was the morning that we feared feared
the nights we cried so long ago have come to rest right here.
And so we’ll cry these tears of pain from sorrow we must store
t
he tears we have are tears we’ve cried a thousand times before.

Father and son, Jack Kombol and Bill, Lyon, France, Feb 1978, a year before he died.

In February 1968, Barry and I picked copper strands from piles of rocks and sticks at the Mine #11 wash plant in Black Diamond.  The wire came from blasting caps used when dynamite dislodged coal at the Rogers #3 mine.  Seven years later I’d work in that mine, learning just how those wires were used.  Over several weekends we collected nearly a pickup load of coiled yellow wire, then burned off the plastic coating.  Dad sold the copper for 40 cents a pound at the recycling yard.  It was souvenir money for us four kids to use during our family’s forthcoming trip to Europe later that spring.

We missed the last few weeks of school.  In Ireland, England, Wales, and the continent we saw historic sights, tasted new foods, and explored a world far removed from our own.  We also visited the embodiment of death – Dachau, the Jewish concentration camp near Munich.  The visitor’s center displayed black and white photos of emaciated bodies, showing all manner of depravity.

Mom kept a journal of our trip so I know the day we visited Dachau – May 31, 1968.

The guide told of Jewish children with tattooed numbers on bony arms – herded from rail cars, not knowing their fate. We walked through the barracks, gas chambers, and crematoriums where thousands died at the hands of their Nazi henchmen. We saw death on an unimaginable scale.  I’ve never forgotten that visit or the sign on the entrance gate: Arbeit macht frei. “Work sets you free.” Mom read its translation from Arthur Frommer’s Europe on $5 a Day,

The sign on the gate as you enter Dachau – Work sets you free.

Three weeks after coming home, I turned 15.  Four days later a boy I’d grown up with died.  John Sherwood attended our Presbyterian church.  His parents, Earl and Isabelle Sherwood were our youth group leaders and taught us Sunday school.  John was a troubled lad who’d just flunked 10th grade.  On a warm summer evening in early July, John went to a party and guzzled 190-proof Everclear from a bottle.  Mr. Sherwood found his son slumped over the front seat of their car just after midnight.  The Enumclaw police never figured out who provided the bottle, though some teens in town surely knew.

He was the first contemporary I’d known who died.  John was 16.  The coroner’s jury attributed his death to “consuming excessive amounts of liquor furnished by a person or persons unknown.”  The Courier-Herald ran articles linking his death to narcotic and alcohol abuse among local youth in 1968.  Glue sniffing was a particular concern that year.

The following spring our Cascadian yearbook printed his photo in remembrance, followed by a short poem:

John Sherwood’s page in our high school yearbook.

He is not dead, this friend not dead,
But in the path we mortals tread
Got some few, trifling steps ahead
And nearer to the end;
So that you too, once past the bend,
Shall meet again, as face to face, this friend
You fancy dead.

Robert Louis Stevenson   

Sporting a Nehru jacket on my first day of high school as a sophomore, Sept. 1968

When you’re young, five years is practically forever.  “Puff the Magic Dragon” was a distant memory.  Heading to high school in September new adventures emerged.  I started a job as the Saturday boy at Palmer’s mine office in Black Diamond.  I joined the chess team and found the calling of a new sport.  By summer, I’d have a driver’s license plus two more jobs to fill my days.  Papa and Grandma were fading memories.

As boyhood drew to a close, a young man began to emerge.  My horizons broadened.  Ahead of me lay many deaths . . . relatives, classmates, and loved ones.  Those first tastes of mortality would always be with me, but  childhood fears were fading.  A new set of adolescent anxieties gripped me.  I was growing up and the world was growing bigger.